Begin Where You Are

So I have about a half dozen, half written blog posts from Thanksgiving to now. Today I made the decision to hit delete on all of them and begin where I am!

Here’s a quick recap to get you up to date!

I made it through my first empty nest holiday season! I learned some valuable lessons, the most important being that my kids need to be home for the holidays. They want and need that down time to see friends, experience traditions, connect with friends and recharge. Although this may change as time goes by, for now I am going to do my best to keep this in mind as I plan in the future holidays!

The new year came and went pretty uneventfully, and for that I am grateful. However, I was expecting 2019 to start off with a little more inspiration and energy. This is going to be my first full year of not having any kids at home to fuss over. I thought I would wake up on January 2nd full of electricity and focus ready to accomplish all the things I have been talking about for the last four years. I did give myself a little reprieve at first. I told myself my new year didn’t actually start until both kids were back at school and my days were my own again. Around the first of February I realized I was still just poking around. No blog posts had been written, no pages towards that book I want to write materialized, no great health revolution had taken hold. I had spent some time on all, but no real progress on any front. I vowed to get it together, but February trudged on with no change. . .untilĀ it clicked for me last weekend. I am not only energized and excited, but hopeful with possibility!

Last weekend I took my first solo, non work related trip ever. Yes I said ever. I have always traveled with friends, family or colleagues. Last weekend I went to the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators winter conference in New York. I drove myself to the train station, boarded the train and set off to the city. I pushed myself outside my comfort zone both literally and figuratively. I challenged myself to connect with people I had never met and to believe that I could be part of this community. I took notes, talked and listened. By the time I boarded the train to come home, exhausted and head spinning with information, I believed it! I am a reader, a lover of children’s literature, and yes I am a writer. Will I ever be an author? Only time will tell that. Although I really don’t have control over if I will be published, I do have control over how I spend my time and where I put my focus.

So I begin where I am. I will let go of all the previous and abandoned projects with no guilt or judgement. I will make my dreams of today a priority and put my time and focus on moving towards them. Armed with a complete awareness it will not be easy or without challenge I choose to move forward. No matter what happens I will celebrate my effort and evolution.

Happy New Year! Oh, and Happy Valentines Day too<3