Wow, this has not gotten off to the start I had envisioned in my head. At the end of 2016, sick of being sick, I decided that 2017 was going to be the year I changed it all. I was going to start a journey to wellness; commit to daily yoga, meditation and learn all that I could about Ayurveda. I was going to do all this while continuing with life as I know it and blog about it every day. In my head, this new adventure would bring me wellness and clarity.I would feel great and know precisely what I am meant to do in my looming chapter 3. It was perfect, what could go wrong?
As I sit here on February 27th writing my first blog post I have to laugh at myself. I am not sure why I thought I would wake up on January 1 of 2017 and be a completely different person than the one I have been for the last 47 years. You see, I have had hundreds of great ideas and new plans over the years that never quite come to fruition. I really don’t think I am all that different from most people. I know there are those people we see all over the internet and social media that just wake up one day or are born with this amazing gift of knowing what to do and the drive to do it. Unfortunately, I am not one of those. Don’t get me wrong, I know I have lots of great thoughts, ideas and instincts. I just get lost in the details of things. I get so caught up in how to do something “right” I don’t get a lot done, and while I am tangled in the details of one idea another one floats by. And yes you guessed it. . . I am off in a new direction. Yes, I am one of those!
Since the start of the year on top of being lost in the details of this “life changing journey” I have had a few stones in my path that have taken me off course. On New Year’s Eve I sliced off part of my thumb while preparing amazing snacks for our celebration. I learned a few things from that experience: I will never use a mandolin again. When you chop off nerves, it really hurts and takes a long time to heal. I use my thumb much more than I ever imagined. We had a family emergency that pulled me out-of-town for a few days. We passed around a horrible could for a month. In addition to these unexpected challenges we had life; a long weekend college visit, house hold upkeep and the ever constant high school drama. During all of this I did make it to an initial visit with a wonderful Ayurveda practitioner. I did do some yoga, meditation and reading. I did get the blog set up, although I have spent most of my hours changing the layout back and forth and never really finding that perfect one. Countless hours were spent trying to figure out how to add widgets, whatzits, categories and tags with no results to show for it. I stressed over where I would get pictures to put with posts. I really was spinning off course. I lost sight of the fact that none of that really matters if you haven’t shared anything! So I have abandoned the details. I am going to focus on the meat. For this adventure that will be the yoga, meditation, reading, writing and Ayurveda. I am guessing the other will work itself out eventually. 😉
The bottom line is that nothing has gone as planned, and that is ok! I know this project will be different, because I am different already. I am not beating myself up. Through this process I have already learned that I am a caregiver, my family will always come first. If they need me, the rest will have to wait. I am interested in many things, but I get easily distracted. This is who I am. That doesn’t mean I give up and accept not achieving my goal. It means going to live and learn, make adjustments, move forward and see where this journey takes me.
Well. . . I took the first step! See you next time,